the ARP jokes thread!!!!!....come post ur jokes here!!!!!! - Page 103

Adrian Wong · 22nd Jun 2005, 11:42 PM

ROTFL!!! Saxophone!!!

u suck.com · 23rd Jun 2005, 07:05 AM

Quote:

There were two whales swimming around the ocean one day when one whale said let's have some fun.

A ship was sailing above them so they decided to tip it over by blowing huge airbubbles through their blowholes.

All the men on the ship flew into the water. The first whale said let's eat them. The second whale replied "Look the blowjob was fun but there's no way in hell i'm swallowing any seamen."

heehee...

PsYkHoTiK · 23rd Jun 2005, 08:07 AM

ROTFLMAO! Saxaphone!

u suck.com · 24th Jun 2005, 05:16 AM

"DIY home-made spoiler"

digitalvoice · 24th Jun 2005, 05:36 PM

Good manners!

During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners asks the students, one by one "Michael, if you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" she asked.

"Just a minute, I have to go piss."

The teacher replied "That would be rude and impolite!"
"What about you John, how would you say it?"

"I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right back."

The teacher responded,
"That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the table."
"And you Peter, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners?"

"I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after supper."

The teacher fainted.

Jet · 24th Jun 2005, 05:39 PM

ROTFL!!!!!!!!!!!

Nice joke DV!!!!!

Shave the 'hand'??

Sound not correct..

ESP · 24th Jun 2005, 06:49 PM

Shake hands?

Jet · 26th Jun 2005, 05:20 PM

I haven't contributed for aged already..

Here are some..

Quote:

An exhausted looking man dragged himself in to the Doctor's office.

"Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and
all night, and I can't get a wink of sleep."

"I have good news for you," the doctor answered; rummaging through a
drawer full of sample medications. "Here are some new sleeping pills
that work like a dream. A few of these and your trouble will be over."

"Great," the man answered, "I'll try anything. Let's give it a shot."

A few weeks later, the man returned, looking worse than ever. "Doc,
your plan is no good. I'm more tired than before!"

"I don't understand how that could be," said the doctor; shaking his
head. "Those are the strongest sleeping pills on the market!"

"That may be true," answered the man wearily. "But, I'm still up all
night, chasing those dogs, and, when I finally catch one, it's hard
getting him to swallow the pill!!!"

Quote:

Pay Per Point
A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed
out all of the tests and went back to his desk...

When the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The
professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill
to his test with a note saying "A dollar per point!"

The next class the professor returned the exams to the students. To
the student who had attempted to bribe him, he handed back his test
and $37 change.

I almost laughed in the library.

Adrian Wong · 26th Jun 2005, 10:47 PM

ROTFL!! That's HILARIOUS!!!!

Brian · 27th Jun 2005, 12:42 PM

http://www.storewars.org/flash/index.html
watch it XD
THE FARM!
THATS NO MOON THATS A MELON!
CHEWBROCCOLI!
THAI FIGHTERS!

22nd Jun 2005, 11:42 PM	#1021 (permalink)
Adrian Wong Da Boss Join Date: 10 Oct 2002 Location: In front of my ASUS F8V notebook! Posts: 30,124 Reputation: 3081 Rep Power: 67	ROTFL!!! Saxophone!!! __________________ Dr. Adrian Wong Tech ARP \| Blog @ Tech ARP \| The Free Trade Zone DYKT : The only offshore account I have is at the sand bank? Keep Tech ARP free! Visit our sponsors! We need PROGRAMMERS and TECHNICAL WRITERS! Contact us if you are a hot shot programmer or technical writer! My items for sale : 50x SD Card \| Memory Stick PRO \| Cyclone Energy Saver \| Seiko SS watch \| Tiger/Carlsberg beer jugs \| Travel Speakers \| Motorola V600 \| Nokia N90 SOLD! \| New Lowepro Mini Trekker AW Other items for sale @ the FTZ : Zalman CNPS9500 LED @ $20 \| Zalman CNPS7700 Cu @ $20 \| Zalman CNPS7000 Cu @ $20 \| Swarovski bracelet watches \| Dell 17" LCD \| Hi-Fi speakers \| English DIVX movies \| HP LaserJet toners! \| Office chairs

23rd Jun 2005, 08:07 AM	#1023 (permalink)
PsYkHoTiK "Little" Devil Join Date: 8 Apr 2004 Location: On the "throne" Posts: 14,320 Reputation: 4003 Rep Power: 59	ROTFLMAO! Saxaphone! __________________ Intel SLAPL 4.3GHz @ 1.35v : 2x2GB OCZ Platinum DDR2 1066 : Asus P5K Premium : WD Raptor X : G92 8800GTS 512mb 800MHz Core WIP : XFi Platinum : Silverstone OP650 : Silverstone TJ-07 : Vista Ultimate Edition : Dtek FuZion CPU : Swiftech MCW60 : MCP655 : Thermochill PA120.3 w Scythe Ultra Kaze : Tygon R3603 1/2" ID 3/4" OD CPU-Z: SLAPL : SLA9U : FX-55 : DDR 600 : VX www.techarp.com

24th Jun 2005, 05:16 AM	#1024 (permalink)
u suck.com ■ ■ ■ ■ Join Date: 20 Nov 2003 Location: where? Posts: 3,757 Reputation: 552 Rep Power: 14	"DIY home-made spoiler" __________________

24th Jun 2005, 05:36 PM	#1025 (permalink)
digitalvoice Super Active Join Date: 14 Apr 2004 Location: Kuala Lumpur Posts: 2,438 Reputation: 900 Rep Power: 16	Good manners! During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners asks the students, one by one "Michael, if you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" she asked. "Just a minute, I have to go piss." The teacher replied "That would be rude and impolite!" "What about you John, how would you say it?" "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right back." The teacher responded, "That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the table." "And you Peter, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners?" "I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after supper." The teacher fainted. __________________ Black or white,...they're all the same!

24th Jun 2005, 06:49 PM	#1027 (permalink)
ESP Super Active Join Date: 8 Jan 2005 Posts: 2,121 Reputation: 715 Rep Power: 13	Shake hands? __________________ -eSp-

24th Jun 2005, 05:39 PM	#1026 (permalink)
Jet Hold me back! I can't stop posting!!! Join Date: 5 Sep 2004 Posts: 6,694 Reputation: 1274 Rep Power: 23	ROTFL!!!!!!!!!!! Nice joke DV!!!!! Shave the 'hand'?? Sound not correct..

26th Jun 2005, 10:47 PM	#1029 (permalink)
Adrian Wong Da Boss Join Date: 10 Oct 2002 Location: In front of my ASUS F8V notebook! Posts: 30,124 Reputation: 3081 Rep Power: 67	ROTFL!! That's HILARIOUS!!!! __________________ Dr. Adrian Wong Tech ARP \| Blog @ Tech ARP \| The Free Trade Zone DYKT : The only offshore account I have is at the sand bank? Keep Tech ARP free! Visit our sponsors! We need PROGRAMMERS and TECHNICAL WRITERS! Contact us if you are a hot shot programmer or technical writer! My items for sale : 50x SD Card \| Memory Stick PRO \| Cyclone Energy Saver \| Seiko SS watch \| Tiger/Carlsberg beer jugs \| Travel Speakers \| Motorola V600 \| Nokia N90 SOLD! \| New Lowepro Mini Trekker AW Other items for sale @ the FTZ : Zalman CNPS9500 LED @ $20 \| Zalman CNPS7700 Cu @ $20 \| Zalman CNPS7000 Cu @ $20 \| Swarovski bracelet watches \| Dell 17" LCD \| Hi-Fi speakers \| English DIVX movies \| HP LaserJet toners! \| Office chairs

27th Jun 2005, 12:42 PM	#1030 (permalink)
Brian Hold me back! I can't stop posting!!! Join Date: 17 May 2003 Location: pj Posts: 5,670 Reputation: 179 Rep Power: 12	http://www.storewars.org/flash/index.html watch it XD THE FARM! THATS NO MOON THATS A MELON! CHEWBROCCOLI! THAI FIGHTERS! __________________ c2quad q6600 gigabyte p35-ds3 2gb ddr2 667 radeon hd2600xt dell 2407fpw-hc