the ARP jokes thread!!!!!....come post ur jokes here!!!!!!

[Adrian Wong]

Two men got out of their cars after they collided at an intersection. One took a flask from his pocket and said to the other, "Here, maybe you'd like a nip to calm your nerves." "Thanks," he said, and took a long pull from the container. "Here, you have one, too," he added, handing back the whiskey. "Well, I'd rather not," said the first. "At least not until after the police have been here."

[Mac Daddy]

Ohh thats sneaky

[Adrian Wong]

Okay, here are some dumb laws in Alabama.

It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.

Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.

You may not drive barefooted.

It is illegal to maim oneself to escape duty.

It is illegal to impersonate a person of the clergy.

Women are able to retain all property they owned prior to marriage in the case of divorce. However, this provision does not apply to men.

Masks may not be worn in public.

Putting salt on a railraod track may be punishable by death.

Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.

Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.

It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.

Men may not spit in front of the opposite sex.

Incestous marriages are legal.

It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.

You must have windshield wipers on your car.

You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.

Anniston
You may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street.

Jasper
It is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb.

Lee County
It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.

Mobile
It is unlawful to wear women's pumps with sharp, high heels.

It is unlawful to howl at ladies inside the city limits.

Montgomery
It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of it spooking horses. (Repealed)

[Mac Daddy]

LOL

[Dander]

lolz, nice list of jokes cant stop laughing

[lee_what2004]

Originally Posted by Adrian Wong

Okay, here are some dumb laws in Alabama.

LMAO!!!

[Yukirin]

Originally Posted by Adrian Wong

It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
Only applicable on driver
Incestous marriages are legal.

Are these laws for real
If it's real they should go

[mikegas]

Originally Posted by Adrian Wong

Jasper
It is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb.

This actually become a saying "The rule of thumb"

[Chai]

A wealthy hospital benefactor was being shown around the hospital.
During her tour she passed a room where a male patient was being given a
hand job by a nurse's aide.

"Oh my God!" said the woman. "That's disgraceful! "

The doctor leading the tour calmly explained, "I'm sorry that you were
exposed to that, but this man has a serious condition where his
testicles rapidly fill with semen, and if they aren't emptied at least
five times a day, he'll be in extreme pain and his testicles could
easily rupture."

"Oh, well that's reasonable, then." said the woman.

As they passed by the very next room, they saw a male patient laying in
bed while a nurse performed oral sex on him.
Shocked, the woman said, "Oh my GOD! That's truly disgraceful!
How can THAT be justified?"

Again the doctor replied calmly, "Same illness, better health plan."

[Mac Daddy]

Hee hee classic Chai