the ARP jokes thread!!!!!....come post ur jokes here!!!!!!

[Jet]

Funny or not?

>>BOY : May I hold your hand?
>>GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.
>>
>>GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
>>BOY : You love me...
>>
>>GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
>>BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
>>
>>GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
>>BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple
>>
>>GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
>>BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??
>>
>>BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
>>GIRL : How soon??
>>
>>BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
>>GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??
>>
>>SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??
>>TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his
>>mouth. R>>>
>>MAN : You remind me of the sea.
>>WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
>>MAN : NO, because you make me sick.
>>
>>WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out
>>of the other.
>>HUSBAND : You tell a woman omething: It goes in both ears and
>>comes out of the mouth.
>>
>>MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think,
>>Peter?
>>PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.
>>
>>1) Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
>>Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".
>>
>>2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
>>Pupil : "The moon".
>>Teacher : "Why?"
>>Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the
>>sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".
>>
>>3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when
>>people are no longer interested?"
>>Pupil : "A teacher".
>>
>>4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"
>>Customer : "What other colors do you have?"
>>
>>5) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was
>>called current affairs.
>>
>>6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
>>Sam : "It's a family tradition".
>>Teacher : "What do you mean?"
>>Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a
>>teacher".
>>Teacher : "What about your mother?" Sam : "She's a woman".
>>
>>7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've
>>failed?"
>>David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's
>>performance repeated".
>>
>>8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and< >>>stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"
>>Student : "Brotherly love".
>>
>>9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
>>eating?"
>>Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook".
>>
>>10) Patient : "What re the chances of my recovering doctor?"
>>Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical reco rds show that nine out
>>of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case
>>I've treated. The others all died".
>>
>>11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
>>One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same
>>day and at the same time."
>>
>>12) Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his
>>father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
>>Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
>>One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."

I think some are funny..

[Adrian Wong]

Here are some for today!

[Adrian Wong]

More!

[PsYkHoTiK]

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The last one was REALLY GOOD!

[Jet]

Originally Posted by PsYkHoTiK

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The last one was REALLY GOOD!

Ya.....

[zy]

good one

[siddiq]

omg sperm evolusion. hahaha

[siddiq]

dunno wheter already posted. but damn funny

[zy]

omg.. good one siddiq

[Jet]

Good joke siddiq...